Girl Talk.

I've got a question for all you ladies out there.

Where do you put on your makeup?

Growing up, my parents had a long counter in their bathroom with a sink on either side.  I have vivid memories of my Mom hopping up on the countertop and sitting with her bottom on the edge and her feet in the sink, putting on her makeup.  I thought every Mom did this!  She had free range of the massive mirror, lots of great lighting, and could get as close up to her reflection as she needed.  She perched atop the bathroom countertop like a squirrel on a fence, dolling up her face and talking to me about my friends, school, church .... just life.  Great memories.

She later graduated to an armoire with a seat and a lighted makeup mirror.  Functional, yes.  But probably not as fun for her.

My makeup area is neither fun, functional, nor memory making.  Frankly, it's flat boring.

I put my makeup on the living room couch every single day.

I'm not sure why I chose this spot, but I've been powdering my nose on the couch ever since we said "I do".  It's probably for the lack of space we once had in our teeny tiny apartment as newlyweds ... and maybe it stuck so I continued doing it when we moved into our house.  I don't know.  But that's where I put it on.  I flip on the overhead light (still not optimal lighting), and get to paintin'.  I'm usually tearing an eyeshadow palette or blush brush from the baby's hands, so I wouldn't say it's the most calming or relaxing area for me to retreat to .... but this is a nearly 8 year habit in the making, and old habits die hard.

My dream of dreams in my heart of hearts, is to one day have a grand and luxurious bathroom.  And in that grand and luxurious bathroom, I will have an over the top vanity fit for a princess and it will be mine.  All mine.  It will be perfectly feminine and a spot solely for me.  After all, I am the queen of the castle, right? ;)



If I had this vanity of which I speak, I would sit at it each night and brush my hair until I reached 100 strokes.  And then I would slip off my satin slippers and silken robe and crawl into my billowing bed laden with the softest sheets and the fluffiest of pillows.  I would lay and read Tolstoy until I fell asleep, dreaming happy dreams of open fields and breezy days.

Ya know, instead of tossing my hair up into a tangled up bun, throwing on one of Husby's oversized t-shirts and scooting Levi's "Wolfie" out of my way (that he left the night before when he snuck into our bed at 4am) as I lay my head on my super-flat-because-I-need-a-new pillow and poke myself with a Hot Wheel that someone left as a surprise for me.  Oh, and yes, reading a biography on Walt Disney.

Yes.  That's what I would do.



And at this vanity of mine I would set fresh flower bouquets every few days.  I would perfectly arrange all of my perfume bottles according to size, and I would have an antique dish to place my jewelry that I took off each evening.  I would make Husby fasten my necklaces around my neck as I sat on the petite chair, having important conversations while looking at each other through the mirror.  I would order the perfume bottles that you have to puff on yourself, and insist on transferring all of my scents into those delicate little fancies.

Ya know, instead of a TINY bathroom countertop smeared with dried yet still gooey toothpaste. And it's orange toothpaste so it leaves weird orange stains in the sink that make you gag because for some reason every time you see it you think of salmonella.  Who buys orange toothpaste and where's my Crest?  And the clutter is starting to overtake the entire bathroom and you think if you see another travel size of anything you are going to explode and start throwing things. Who needs 18 travel sized deodorants and 172 travel sized toothpastes?  Us.  Apparently.

Yes.  That's what I would do.



And if I ever get this bathroom of which I dream, I just might have an oversized tuft.  I will sit on it and maybe even lay on it.  And I will lotion my limbs whilst humming delicate tunes.

Ya know, instead of sitting on the edge of the bathtub rubbing lotion frantically all over my body before a tiny visitor or two starts banging on the door.  And then I slip and fall because the floor is wet from my shower and my feet are wet from the lotion and why oh why do I not have a tuft?!?!

Yes.  That's what I would do.

But until then, my friends, I will remain perched upon my couch.



Telling stories as I spread my foundation.
Singing silly songs as I apply my mascara.
Reciting memory verses as I pinken my cheeks.
And smiling brightly at my perfect little boys running around me as I color my lips.

I have a feeling that if I ever get my dream bathroom with my oh so glorious vanity, it probably won't live up to my expectations.  Because what I have now is pretty doggone perfect.

Now tell me ... where do you put on your makeup?