Thursday, September 11, 2008

Middle Aged Women.

I have wanted to be a stay-at-home mommy for as long as I can remember. My mom was one my entire life and she always made sure everything in the house was taken care of and just right. She was there to pick us up from school, fix us snacks, listen to our days and go to every event we ever had. She poured herself into our lives and it made a lasting impression on me. One that I want to carry out for my future children.

Something that I have always desired is to go to ladies Bible studies throughout the day, and prayer groups, and play dates and other events that other stay-at-home mommies do for spiritual growth and fellowship. I am one of the few girls in my Sunday School class without children yet, and also one of the few that work outside the home. I so long for the day that I can do these things with these great girls and truly live out the dream that I have always had.

I grew up in a small church with around 350 people. I knew every person there – from the babies to the elderly. It was after Husby and I moved to the Big Town after marriage, that I realized how unique and special that was. The Church that we are in now is absolutely excellent and quite a bit larger than our old Church. It is the most challenging teaching that either of us have ever been under and we have are absolutely in love with the Church and the people.

We are extremely fortunate to have built great friendships and bonds with so many couples our age. Our Sunday School class has around 30 “young married” couples and I just love each and every one of them. When searching for a Church after moving to the Big Town, a problem we were having was finding anyone that was even around our age. When the Lord blessed us with this Church and this group of people that we are with now, we were absolutely astounded. We jumped into Couples Bible Studies, and other various small groups. We found the perfect Church for so many different areas in our lives. Something that has been missing in the three years that we have been there, though, is the relationships with people outside of our age group.

When you work, and aren’t able to attend different day-events, like the things I mentioned above, it is hard to get to know people outside your age group. I very much want to know people my parent’s age and everything below and above. I think building relationships with those women is vital. They are older, wiser, encouraging and are able to give excellent training since they have so much more “life experience”. I have always had such great relationships with all of my mom’s friends that I was bound and determined to find some relationships like that here!

So…

I joined an evening Bible study for ladies that meet once a week for several months. The first one was Tuesday evening and we are studying Proverbs. The Lord placed many excellent women in there with me to know and grow with. They are just what I was looking for, and as excited as I was to be there with middle aged women, I think they were even more excited – that me, a 25 year old girl wanted to join them. It was just great.

And until the day that I can join the day time studies and events, this is just perfect.

"Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God." Titus 2:3-5

25 comments:

  1. What an awesome opportunity for you and them.:)

    I am rereading a book by Debi Pearl called "Created to be His Help Meet." It is about the role that God gave us as wives to play, and the reason that she wrote the book was because of the verses from Titus that you shared here today.
    She wants younger women to benefit from her lifetime of learning about God and marriage.
    I will be doing a post about a part of the book soon.
    It's eye opening.

    I look forward to hearing more about what you learn from God and His middle aged women.

    God Bless,
    Amy:)

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  2. Bible Studies are a great way to grow spiritually and to make new and lasting friendships. I bet you will learn a wealth of information from these ladies.. and I bet they will learn a lot from you to Ms. Whitney! Great scripture. Thanks for sharing.

    Becky

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  3. You are singing my song! In 2005 I was blessed enough to travel on a mission trip to Kenya with not only my Dad, but 2 women from my church that were in their 50's. One, M. had just lost her husband to cancer the year before. The bonding with those two ladies has left such a lasting impression. They are wise, loving, sincere people who love God, and are willing to help me and hold me accountable. (I love my mom, she is fantastic. she also lives 12 hours away.) These other women in the church who have grown children, are able to provide something in my life that I am unable to get from any of my other realationships. How wonderful of you to recognize the blessings that they will bring into your life.

    Oh, and I LOVE, "not too much wine"

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  4. Ahhhh - from one middle aged woman, I have to say, THAT was nice to hear :-)

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  5. I am SO with you on all of this! Those are my dreams too... I long for the day of play dates, afternoon walks, bible studies, baking, having dinner ready for hubby when he comes home from work, etc... I am trying to be content in my current stage of life but it's hard to do sometimes.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts about this. I think its great that you are getting involved with a bible study and older women. I know its a poor excuse but I feel like I just don't have the time right now. We are so busy we rarley have an evening together as it is. One thing we do enjoy though is our small group. We meet Sunday evenings with 4 other couples our age. It has been such a blessing and we really enjoy it. I go to a large church, approx 7000 people a weekend, so getting connected in a small group it VERY important.

    Sorry that was long a "rambly" but just wanted to let you know I totally understand where you are at.

    How do you cope and try to be patient with waiting to live your dream of being a mommy...??? Just wondered b/c I struggle with this sometimes...

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  6. I loved this post. You are so upbeat and although you aren't living your life as a housewife yet - you are on your way to being among the greatest. You keep pluggin away for your family and all these lessons you are learning are going to make you a force to be reckoned with in the mommy circle.

    You already are in the young, hip, wife circle!

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  7. I think it is really good you want to be a SAHM. I myself could never do it, but my mom was one...and I adored her all the more for it.

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  8. I'm so glad you found a place you're happy with and that is helping you grow.

    The package arrived yesterday and I love it!! I'll blog about it next week. Thank you so much! :)

    ~ Sarah

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  9. I really understand where you're coming from on this. I too wish I were free to go to prayer groups during the day, or ladies luncheons. But alas, I have a lot more working in my future. Somehow though, even though I'm not living my 'dream', the Lord is showing me how to be content and happy with what he chooses to give me.

    I'll say a prayer today that he'll allow you to stay home and be a mother soon, it's obvious you'll be fantastic at it!

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  10. i posted a pic of the dress over at my place. i like it. it is kinda little house on the prairie though!

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  11. That is so great! I have been longing for a group like that at our church as well....we are very very small church (like 150 on a good Sunday). I have found though, that if you can't find that at church (DH and I know we are called to this one) there are lots of other places for that Titus 2 mentorship. The blog world is one of them!

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  12. good for you!!! I need more Jesus in my life. Doesn't everyone?

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  13. I'm glad you are going to the study I am going to the one during the day. I am really excited about it. I started going to the night group then I switched to the day when I had Zoey. I will be praying for you.

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  14. What a beautiful post! I am also 25, and I feel the same as you, that we need to have friends in all age groups. We were attending a church for a while that is mostly college-age, single or just-married people. Few kids, and very few older people. I always felt that something was missing there.

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  15. Oh I love you. This is my heart - exactly. Unfortunately for me at this time, the only night time bible studies that are offered through my church are geared towards people my age. I'm longing for the day when I can be at home during the day and attend day time meetings, but until then I just pray that a door opens and I have an opportunity like you're experiencing.

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  16. I totally share your feelings and can not wait to be a SAHM and wife. I will look into an evening bilble study class at my church. Our church is huge and this may be one way to make it more intimate. Also now that I am out of college and have been for several years it is harder to met new people!!!

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  17. I am a SAHM who provides childcare for 3. I've been doing this 10 yrs. It's been great for, I've been home with my own 2, who are teens now. We are in a GREAT church as well. I would love to be able to do the "Day" things as well, but...
    I hope to by next summer. After 10 years of being home, I need to "stretch" myself, spiritually. I, like you, have great relationships with young people as well as "older" people. It's the way I grew up. It's made me who I am today. I am 42. Good luck on your "Journey" and I look forward to following your process. Be Blessed.

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  18. I'm so glad you found a bible study that you enjoy. I want to hear all about it! Don't worry your day is coming when you can stay home with all your babies...plural because remember your needle over the wrist test...triplets! AAAHHH!

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  19. It sounds like you are in a wonderful church! I'm so glad there are mothers there who stay at home that you can be with when time comes for you. In our church there were very few staying at home, and the few that did went back to work pretty soon after the kids entered school...so I was kind of lonely for others who shared my passion for staying at home.

    I think it's wonderful that you are getting to know the older women in your church too. I'm sure your group will be all the richer for having young and older women participating.

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  20. From one of those middle aged lady friends of your Mother's - those ladies are so blessed to have you in their study group. It is always encouraging to be able to touch the life of a younger woman. Love you, Whit.

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  21. You are wise beyond your years! It is a pleasure reading your blog every day. What a treasure you are to those around you and the blogging community.

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  22. what a sweetheart you are! I think it is great that you desire to learn from "older" women. I like to remember that we are all older than someone else and it is so important that we are all taking opportunities to "sow" into those younger than us and to also seek out the wisdom of those older than ourselves. You have a great heart. I can tell that you'll be a great mom...just by reading your blog. Blessings!

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  23. Good for you. It's amazing how church can build community and friends...and so important. Be patient. Being at home with your kids is definitely a blessing that will come in time...but sometimes (a lot of times) you might just want to pull your hair out and wish you were working an 8 to 5 again. :)

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  24. I love your blog, I can't believe all these great people I am coming across here in blogland. I live in NYC and it is very different. Not so much better or worse just different, different priorities. I had my dd when I was 35, she is 11 now (you do the math, I just can't call myself the m word!) It's great that you want to be a mom, I know to a lot of people this will sound bad but I think woman are suppose to stay home and raise their children. Yes its hard but nothing can compare. I was lucky enough to have my own business so I could be there for my dd. I ran a full time clothing business and was still classmother ever year in elementary school, went on trips, arranged class picnics, was home after school...it was a priviledge and a joy...

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  25. I'm enjoying your blog , it's a good read . I hope you'll want to meet some women even a little older . Like 60's and 70's . We have a joy for life and A love for God also . .
    God Bless You Sweet Girl .
    Mary

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May the Lord bless you and keep you safe today! Thanks for the comment, friends! :)

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