Friday, July 25, 2008

WINNER, MOMENTS & AN AWARD

Okay, okay, after I picked myself up off the floor from laughing so hard at your embarrassing moments, I decided it was time to choose a winner. Seriously, these are all absolutely hysterical.

Initially, I was going to choose the moment that made me laugh the hardest, but that was impossible. Because I laughed my brains clear out of my head on almost all of them. So....I used a random generator to pick a winner.

I used this website, Random Winner, and I love it!

CONGRATULATIONS GOES TO KEELY STEGER - COMMENT #7!!
Random Integer Generator
Here are your random numbers:
7
Timestamp: 2008-07-25 13:35:28 UTC

Keely, please e-mail me at glamlifehousewife@gmail.com with your mailing address, and you will recieve your Ped Egg ASAP. :)

And in all fairness for you bearing your humiliation to me, I thought I would share two of my moments that I wanted to crawl under a rock from experiencing. It was kind of hard to pick just two, but when I think of being embarrassed beyond belief, these two things always come to mind.

Embarrassing Moment # 1 (I HAVE NEVER TOLD THIS TO ANYONE)
I like to think of myself as a proper person. I dated husby for 4 years before we got married and not ONCE did he hear me burp or heaven forbid…toot. I actually told him one time that I do not do those things at all – never – not even in the privacy of my, myself and I. I don’t think he believed me, but I hoped he would. I once had a conversation with a guy friend from college and he told me he and his fiance did those things in front of each other every day. I gasped in horror and repugnance, and he went on to tell me that husby and I were weird for not doing that. I knew he was wrong. I boasted in my girliness and femininity at all times and wanted husby to know that I was a lady through and through – a proper lady who never did those kinds of things.

On our honeymoon, we took a Caribbean cruise. It was day 4 on the sea and we were all dressed up for formal night. I was in a beautiful canary yellow gown with fantastic jewelry and killer shoes. We enjoyed a lovely dinner together, gazing in each others eyes and being totally in love. After dinner, we took a stroll around the ship and stopped at a map to see where the closest exit was, so that we could sit outside and gaze at the stars. We both stood in front of the map on Deck 3, quietly and intently, as we searched for our exit, when we both heard a “toooot”.

Oh. My. Word. I could have died. Husby looked over at me and my face turned 3 shades of red. “IT WASN’T ME!”, I yelled. He died laughing immediately and said, “Man, Whitney – you got married and let everything go!” I wanted to cry. I was mortified. There we were, standing on Deck 3, and I was near tears in humiliation and he was too…from laughing. To this day, he reminds me of the time I “Deck Three’d”, and I still insist that it wasn’t me. Though we both know good and well that it was.

Embarrassing Moment # 2
My In-Laws were moving out of their house a few years ago and husby and I drove down to help them. A nice middle aged woman, who was helping take care of husby’s grandfather at the time, was helping out as well. My Mother-In-Law instructed me and the woman to go outside and vacuum all the mattresses.

I was bewildered as to how we were going to vacuum the mattresses, but the nice woman came up with a brilliant idea. She was going to hold the mattresses up, while I took the long hose vacuum nozzle and went up and down with it. The entire time we were out there, I was wondering why were vacuuming mattresses. The whole thing just seemed weird to me.

We vacuumed two successfully and were on our last one. The hose was extremely powerful. Once I got it near the mattress, it kept sucking on there forcefully and I would have to pull to get it off. It was beginning to become very hard work.

The hose seemed to be jammed or something so I took it off the mattress and held it out in front of me. I looked inside and it seemed to be free of any clogging, and I said to the woman, “I don’t know what’s wrong with this”. Just as I spoke, it was as if the hose jumped from my hands and onto the woman’s left boob.

I gasped! She gasped! I screamed! She screamed! I was still holding the hose and I didn’t know what to do. I started yelling, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry” – but it was still stuck on there. She turned the vacuum off and off it went. We still had to finish the mattress but I was laughing so hard and so humiliated as to what I had just done that I had to go inside. I walked in, fell on the floor and it took me 10 minutes to explain to everyone what had just happened. I could not face her again. I had violated her with a vacuum.

So there ya have it – my humiliating moments!

Okay - to make this post even LONGER (hey, I'll be gone all next week, and I know you'll miss me), I recieved my very first bloggie award this week from Romi and I want to thank her sooooo much! I am beyond excited that you chose me, and I want to spread the love. And the award.



Once an award is received, the rules are as follows:

1. Put the logo on your blog.

2. Add a link to the person who awarded you.

3. Nominate at least five other blogs.

4. Add links to those blogs on your blog.

5. Leave a message for your nominee on their blog.

Okay - and here are my nominations!

Pleasant Drive - She is new to the blogging world and just fantastic at it. She always keeps you interested and ready for more!

The Pink Potpourri - She has each day of the week devoted to something new and she always has an ecouraging word to say. Plus, her layout is to die for! :)

The Life of Lindsey D - Lindsey has fun tips about being a wife, making a home, and always has great pictures. Check it out - you won't be sorry.

Choose to Bloom - These girls are great mommies and wives. They are living for the Lord and making Him better known.

Melissa Ellen - She makes me laugh every time I set foot on her site. Love it! Plus, she has a great layout as well.

OKAY, this post is finally winding down. I just had so much to cover today: The winner, my embarassing moments and my nominations for the award. Phew. Now I can breathe.

I will be gone for the next week. (SEATTLE, HERE I COME!) I will be sad to miss out on all that is going on here in the blogosphere, and I will miss you dearly (but I won't miss my desk and work), but don't fret. I will be back and better than ever next week. I have so many ideas for my new fun blogs so....STAY TUNED!

Bye, Lovies!

15 comments:

  1. Congrats to Keely Steger!

    Whitney, I hope you and yur husby have an absolutely wonderful vacation. You'll have to take loads of pictures to share with us. See you next week.

    Toodles~

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  2. Thanks for the award nomination! You are too funny. I don't do those unfeminine things in front of Brian either, and it drives him nuts! I don't care, though. At least I'm ladylike. Have a blessed trip and enjoy every moment away! Can't wait to hear about it.

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  3. awe :) thanks so much for the nomination! you are sooo sweet and kind. i never win anything! i'll be sure to post this on monday mayhem!

    have a great time in seattle!

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  4. Thanks for the laugh. Those are pretty good!

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  5. Do we get to vote for the next winner? If so, I am voting for Melissa! Also, I LOVED reading your embarrassing moments! :)

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  6. Have a fun trip! I've heard Seattle is georgeous this time of year! We'll miss you!

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  7. BTW In the movie Pet Sematary the evil little kid is named Gage. It also happens to be my sons name. Eeeek! We didn't choose Gage because of that but theres a little fun nugget for ya.

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  8. Have fun on vacation! I loved the boob vacuum story and someday when you have a baby you can blame the toots on him/her...it worked great for me this week! =)

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  9. Your blog is hilarious! I read it to remember my days before children. You are so carefree!

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  10. I have never heard the "Deck Three'd" story, that is hilarious!!! And on your honeymoon no less! It was quite a while into our marriage before anything accidental like that happened. Ha ha! Oh, I laughed so hard.

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  11. Thanks for the award! I feel so special! I am so glad we are going on vaca at the same time. Otherwise I would have to call in sick for an entire week! :)

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  12. oh my gosh! those were just too funny! I totally almost cried..."dek three'd!!" hehe

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  13. Oh, I am so sad. This is my first time visiting and am enjoying my browse so much and now you're leaving us...:) I was drawn here from your profile and just love, love, love your tag line. I had to laugh at your give away as well because my kiddoes just gave me a Ped Egg for my "man" heels. I just started blogging and my very first post was about my teen son giving me a pedicure with the Ped Egg...too funny.

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May the Lord bless you and keep you safe today! Thanks for the comment, friends! :)

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