Monday, May 10, 2010

A Grown-Up Realization.

In the Mother's Day card that I wrote to my Mom, I told her how when I was growing up, she always made everything look and seem so easy. And that it wasn't until now that I am an adult with a child of my own, that I see how HARD it is to make it look easy.

Looking back on my childhood, I don't ever remembering my Mom complaining about anything. She spent her days doing chores around the house, and everything was always in it's place! I don't ever remember there being piles of undone laundry laying around, the kitchen was always shining and there wasn't a drop of dust on any piece of furniture. Every night at 6 o'clock on the dot, without fail, a warm nutritious meal awaited us on the table as soon as Dad walked through the door. Keeping up with a house and four people living in it is not an easy task. She sure made it seem so, though.

Not only was the house beautifully kept, but she was actively involved in everything at Church - women's Bible studies, Sunday School, Moms-In-Touch .... basically any time the doors were opened, she was there. And made sure we all were, too. She even held Bible Studies in her own home and led numerous teens to the Lord. Did I ever hear her complain about being stretched too thin or have too busy of a schedule? Never. If she committed to something, she was there every single time she was called to be there. She only spoke of the blessings, the ways the Lord was working and the sweet times studying the Word with her very best friends.

On top of the house being immaculate and her spiritual life in tact and ever growing, she was always THERE. She was at any and everything my brother and I were ever involved in. She was always the first Mom in line to pick us up at school. She was the class "Mom Party Planner" for holiday parties who brought the biggest and most elaborate foods and favors. She was at every game I ever cheered at for basketball and football for six years straight. She fixed amazing after-school snacks and genuinely wanted to hear everything about my day from kindergarten to graduation. She made sure I had everything I ever needed, lots of things I just wanted, and made my brother and I feel like we were the most special children in the world.

So, the house was perfect, her walk with the Lord was admired, she was a pro at "being there" and somehow balanced being a fabulous wife to my Dad. They laughed together more than any other parents I'd ever seen. They called each other throughout their days probably four or five times --- just to talk. They greeted each other with a long hug and a short kiss every evening before supper. They talked, communicated, and displayed true friendship and love in their marriage relationship. I'm sure they had arguments and their little lovers spats, but did my brother and I ever know about them? Never. They discussed adult matters behind closed doors and had made it a vow on their honeymoon to never go to bed mad at one another. And they never have.

Seeing all of these things that Mom did through the eyes of a child seemed "normal" ... like what all Mom's do. Now, through the eyes of an adult living out what she did, I realize that it was work. It was hard work. Hard work that not all Mom's even attempted, but that mine mastered. She did it all without grumbling or complaining. She danced through the years of my childhood with such beautiful grace.

And she continues to do so.



I want to make it look as easy for my child(ren) as she did for me. And maybe one day they'll come to the realization that I have.

I hope you had a fantastic Mother's Day, my friends. Weebie (and Husby) made my first one very memorable and precious. There is no greater honor than to bear the title, "Mom".

23 comments:

  1. Isn't it amazing how little thought we gave to all of this as children? My mother raised FIVE girls and did it most of the time alone as my Dad was gone so much. She never complained, never got angry, never acted put out that she had to cook and clean and iron and all of the things she did. She was simply selfless. We are fortunate women to have had the moms we were given. I am so glad you cherish yours.

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  2. I hope one day to be able to master the art of mothering like your own mom. She sounds like an amazing lady, and you are lucky to have her.

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  3. wow, she sounds very impressive! :)
    Happy Mothers Day.

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  4. There is no love more pure than a mommy's love!

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  5. Your mom's shoes sound like hard ones to fill, but I'm sure you'll do just fine :). I've often had these same thoughts thinking about my childhood now that I'm a mother. Staying positive and making it look easy is a lot of work, and I need to get better at it!

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  6. I think I gave my mom the same card! It was a pretty floral one from Papyrus, right? Or maybe the message behind the card is universal.

    My mom told me that she didn't feel as if things were easy as a mom, and she is happy to know I didn't remember the messy days of the house or the times she lost her patience. I remember it exactly as the card stated.

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  7. I'm not even a mom yet, but being a wife is hard work I can't imagine throwing children into the mix. I only hope that I can be the type of mom you described. Your mom is the sweetest!

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  8. She sounds amazingly wonderful. I could only aspire to be like that when I have kids of my own :)

    Cabin Fever in Vermont

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  9. Hapy Mother's Day to your mama!!

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  10. I am always telling my mum that I didn't realise how much she did for my sister and me until I had children of my own.

    Your mum is an inspiration. You should ask her to the occasional guest post so we can all learn from her wisdom and experience!

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  11. What a sweet post! How wonderful it is to have such a role model in your life. I'm sure your husband and son (and future kids) will look at you with the same awe and admiration that you see your mother.

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  12. I love your sweet Mom. And you're right: this Mother's Day has a whole new meaning for me. What an awesome and amazingly hard job...and I love it.

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  13. I have come to terms with the fact that I will never be able to live up to my mother's way of doing things, but I have embraced the fact that I can suck up all the learning I can and maybe come a bit close occasionally. Beautiful post. Thanks!

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  14. Aww that's beautiful. I hope I can be that type of mom :)

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  15. For 7 years I lived close to your mom and we became the best of eternal friends. I watched her live the exact life that you have described. I worked for your dad as your mom would call 3-4 times a day just to chat and catch up on events. I watched her go to Luke's activities (remember the band?). I watched as she watched you cheer. I listened to her every prayer in MIT as she and I prayed for Luke and for you and I watched and listened as she learned how to study God's Word even deeper and then excelled at teaching His Word to young people. She is an AMAZING WOMAN OF GOD. She treated my son as if he were her second son. She always always made sure that her pantry had his special snacks in it. She loved him and always told him that. She welcomed him into her home and never kicked him out when him and Luke would light clay creatures on his tile counter in the bathroom and when they made the BEST bomb ever and blew it up and filmed it. (Memories). To God be all the glory for the magnificent mom that Terry Black is. I love her deeply and will someday spend eternity with her and you. Much love friends.

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  16. I've been realizing this very thing over the past few years. Even little things like just making dinner every night can be really challenging with other things going on and my mom was a pro at it! Just like you said, it seemed completely effortless. She was made to be a mom and seeing all of the broken families around me makes me that much more thankful that she worked so hard to keep our family united.

    If you want my opinion, you're making this mom stuff look pretty effortless yourself!

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  17. Both this post, and the post about her hugging the homeless (which I think is amazing) make me wish so badly that your mom was my mom!! I read your blog because I really like your attitude and you inspire me to embrace my oft neglected domestic side. I think a lot of things come naturally to you (even if it doesn't seem like it)without you ever realizing it because you have certain sensibilities instilled in you at a young age by your family. Your mom was obviously an amazing example to you and your brother.

    (although my mom is also an amazing person in her own way)

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  18. What a sweet tribute to your mom ... and she deserves it! You will be just as precious and fantastic to Levi (and those to follow). Thanks for being such a great wife to D and mom to my grandson.

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  19. Wow, reading that makes me want to be your mom. Or at least meet her and learn from her. She sounds amazing. And from what I can tell of your blog, you are following in her footsteps well.

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  20. Wow, I hope I can be that sort of mother some day!

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  21. Hello.... I just stumble on your blog!! I love your post about your mom. I have the same feeling when it comes to my mom too.

    When I become a mom (God willing), I will do the same thing. And even as a housewife who works outside of the house, it always feels it is TOO much to do.

    Ah... I am Fabiola from Brazil.

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May the Lord bless you and keep you safe today! Thanks for the comment, friends! :)

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