Tuesday, June 11, 2013

The Squeaker Sneakers Cured Me.

I always tell Husby that I have a touch of autism.  I'm not at all making fun of autism or negating all that autistic people go through.  It's just that, like in several forms of autism, there are certain noises that absolutely make me crazy.  Like, not just "oh man, that's annoying ... I wish it would stop", but rather - when I hear these specific noises, rage bubbles up inside of me like hot molten lava and I feel like I am going to explode!  I get hot and sweaty and my heart rate shoots to the moon.  And then I get mad.  After the initial feeling of being mad, I get all nervous and anxious and I feel super annoyed.  It's the strangest thing, and I don't know why it happens.

I try to control it, but I can't!  I don't start screaming or throwing things or anything out of the norm - I don't even get the urge to do that at all.  You wouldn't even know I was mad if you were with me.  I just feel mad and anxious.  And hot.  And sweaty.  And flat out annoyed. And then a few seconds later, it just goes away and everything is back to normal.

Husby can block out anything and he remains calm as a cucumber even at the most gratingly irritating noises that could ever be heard.  I don't know how he does it, but noises don't bother him in the least.

I wish I had his patience.

Levi has inherited this hatred o' noises from his Mommy.  He often walks through loud places plugging his ears.  He does not like loud.  At all.  He had his ears plugged for probably the first 6 months of Ezra's life.  Haha!  And now Ezra is really into high pitched squealing for fun and Levi is always suggesting we go put him down for a nap.  Ha!!  Oh Weebie, you come by it honest, little one.

Here are my Trigger Noises:

~ The seatbelt dinging when you don't buckle up.
~ Excessively loud cars, trucks or motorcycles that speed by me. (The people who actually pay money to get their cars to sound like this absolutely enrage me.  I don't get it.)
~ The garbage disposal if I'm not the one running it, therefore not expecting it.
~ Silverware excessively clanging on a glass dish.
~ Teeth scraping/dinging on a fork or spoon. (There is absolutely NO reason this should ever happen, in my opinion.)
~ The Vacuum Noise.  Our vacuum makes this mysteriously LOUD and excruciating noise every now and then if it hits something wrong.  Another mysterious factor: it only happens when Husby runs the vacuum.  (And then I run and hide my rage in the other room because I don't want to give him a reason to not have to run the vacuum if I ask. :) But seriously, you've never heard a noise like it.  It's the worst.
~ Our old dryer buzzer. (UNBELIEVABLY terrible.  Our new one does the most pleasant little trill of a bell, and it is nothing short of delightful .... if you can use the word delightful when describing anything that involves laundry.)
~ Squeaky toys.  Specifically, squeaky dog toys.

I could listen to screaming babies, shattering glass, and all kinds of other annoying sounds all day long - but those specific noises grate on my every nerve.

The other day I ordered Ezra a pair of shoes I found a special on online.  On online?  Hmmm.  Anyway, I ordered these shoes.  And they were just the cutest little shoes.

Bear with me, I'm not chasing rabbits ... this actually has something to do with my highly sensitive ears.

When they arrived in the mail, I oohed and ahhed over the little sandals.  They looked like a perfect fit and I couldn't wait to get them on him.  I sat them in his room, waiting for the next time we would go out so he could wear them.

The next day I slipped on the shoes and sat him down so I could finish getting dressed.  He immediately toddled behind me, following me into my room.

*Squeak. Squeak. Squeak-squeak-squeak. Squeak.*

I stopped dead in my tracks.  No .... it couldn't be.

"Walk for Mommy," I told Ezra.

His face lit up and he started running to me with his arms out.

*squeaksqueaksqueaksqueaksqueeeeeeeak!*

I accidentally ordered squeaky shoes.

What had I DONE?!?!

Ezra was absolutely ENTHRALLED with the shoes.  With each step he took, he looked down at his feet and laughed.  He was dancing around, Hulk stomping the ground with every chance he could get to hear the squeaks.

I pray every day for the fruit of the Spirit to fill my life.  I guess God knew I was needing a good old fashioned lesson on patience.

I was running late, so I kept the shoes on him and went about my business.

We had several errands to run that day and when Ezra gets tired of his stroller or a shopping cart, I let him out to walk around.  And that is when I quickly realized how sheer GENIUS the squeaker shoes are.  Even when I was browsing the stores, searching for the things I needed, I always knew exactly where Ezra was.  If the squeaks weren't as strong, I knew he was stepping away from me.

And then and there, in the middle of Dillards, I fell in love with the sound of squeaks.

Another day Husby and I had to tackle the beast of a mess that was the garage and it was going to take the entire day.  The boys had no other option than to stay outside with us all day.  On went the squeaker shoes and we had constant tabs on Ezra.  Woo hoo! And we always know where Levi is because, well, he's always talking.  :)

I've gotten some looks from people in public who look flat out annoyed when Ezra walks around, and trust me - I GET IT.  I realize that not everyone loves squeaks.  Frankly, I hate squeaks unless they are coming from my child.

It's kind of like the mysterious bodily fluid phenomenon.  You don't mind it from your own children, but other kids' repulse you.

So anyway, Ezra has successfully broken me of one of my trigger noises - The Squeak!  I'm so used to it now that I don't like it when he wears non-squeakers!

(By the way, the squeakers can pop right out of his shoes. Which I fully intended on removing before I realized the beauty of them.)

Now to work on the other noises that go all through me.

Here's to hoping no one comes to soup up our cars while we sleep.  Now that one I don't think I'll ever get over.

{I really and truly think that I have a very mild case of misophonia.  I thought I was making it up until a couple months ago, I saw a special on Dateline or something like that about noises that trigger rage/anxiety inside of people.  I could relate 100%!  Now, some people fly off the handle and literally can not control themselves or their rage.  I'm not like that; I just feel extremely annoyed and anxious!  Apparently Kelly Ripa has it, too, and can't be around her children when they're eating.  I knew it had to be a thing!}









32 comments:

  1. Just an FYI, I have similar issues with some sounds, so I was once told I may have a form of the 4s syndrome, "selective sensitive sound syndrome" you should google it.

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    1. Ooooohhhh ... interesting! Thank you!

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  2. For me, it's when people chew gum with their mouth open. I mean, come on! Are you seriously chomping your gum THAT loudly?!?!

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    1. A phenomenon I will never understand! Haha!

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  3. I developed this as an adult, I think. Loud noises make me cringe. I shut down. Squeaky shoes...not with squeaker but from the rain, etc. typically it's only when mine squeak. Open mouth gum chewing. My husband eating crunchy food next to me. The doorbell irritates me big time! The sound of trucks backing up.

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    1. Oh.... crunchy food. That can definitely trigger it for me, too. Especially if it's the only noise in the room! *_*

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  4. I stumbled onto misophonia a few months ago and I KNOW I HAVE IT TOO!!! My biggest triggers are (are you ready for this?) people eating and people breathing. If you are sitting near me and breathing heavily, I will glare at you every couple seconds and if you are eating noisily (which 99% of people do!!!!) I will ask you what you are doing and if you are okay. I do NOT understand why I flip out at such nonsense!! But it's not just "annoying," it makes that rage bubble up inside me too!!!!! There's no other way of saying it!! :)

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    1. I'm so happy I'm not alone!! Haha! :) Thanks for sharing!

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  5. I'm so glad that you mentioned that you had just re-done your garage! When I saw the pictures, I was practically drooling and wondering how on earth it stays that clean. Thanks for the inspiration!

    Oh, and I can definitely relate to the noise thing. The sound of my kids' chewing drives me nuts, too! It's a great lesson in self-control. :)

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    1. Ohhhh, if only I was brave enough to post "before and after" pictures. It was HORRIBLE!!! Hahaha!!

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  6. It's definitely real! I can't stand chewing noises (even my own, sometimes). Snoring, and popping gum will send me into a rage. I even took the gum from my best friend's mouth in high school! I just couldn't take it!

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    1. This literally made me LOL!

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    2. Oh!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AGREE! Talk about rude! My skin will actually crawl. If i'm out shopping I have to move far away to the other side of the store or leave altogether. That popping noise makes me want to do some popping of my own. Lord, forgive me.

      Once hubby and I was at the movies and the lady behind us was eating popcorn. Loudly. I thought
      the barn animals had come to dinner. eek! I had no idea people could eat that loud. We quickly chose new seats.

      Jake's a Girl

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  7. I don't believe your intent was to be offensive with your autism comments...but it offended me enough to prompt me to comment. As a parent of a child on the spectrum, I just found the remark inappropriate and ignorant. I am not saying this in an attempt to be nasty or mean, but I use the word ignorant because if you knew anything about autism and why those on the spectrum have a tough time with certain things, you would know that your situation is not an appropriate comparison. I just don't think you would ever think it was okay to compare a minor quirk in your person to say, somebody living with Down Syndrome...so why is this okay? Again, my intent here is not to be unkind but my toddler will someday be out there in the world and I will do whatever I can to educate people who do not understand and/or make light of what he goes through. Thanks for reading.

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    1. Allie, I am sorry if I offended you, but as I said before that was NOT my intent. I am being completely serious when I say that to my husband. I know several precious autistic children, and though several of them deal with much more, sounds are major irritants for them .... just like with me. I am not ignorant on the subject at all - I know all about autism, and the various forms. Some major, some not so major, with small things like this effecting one's life. And the way I react to these noises are definitely relatable, so I'm not sure why you found it inappropriate. Again, sorry if you took it the wrong way, but you must know my intent was not to offend. We need to ALL not be "ignorant" in understanding other people trying to properly explain something in their life to the masses, and keeping sure to not judge them or their intent in the meantime.

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    2. I don't think you came across as ignorant or insensitive. My brother has OCD, which is very difficult to live with, and people joke about "having OCD" all the time. I don't get offended every time because I know people don't mean anything by it and aren't trying to offend at all!

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  8. I have read about people who have this problem. One person in particular couldn't eat with other people - like it prevented her with eating a meal with her family because of the sound of people chewing/eating. There's a name for it. I can't remember, but I read an article about it, and it's fascinating. This might be what it was, but this is just a wikipedia entry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Misophonia

    ~K

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  9. I hate it when people eat loudly. I cannot stay in the room with someone who does! My hubby used to clunk his spoon against his teeth all the time when he ate cereal {he'd bite down on his spoon or something?!} but he stopped doing that pretty soon after marrying me!!

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  10. I can totally relate to these things. Especially the loud car. Why would someone continuously rev their engine? I feel "flustered" and confused when I hear loud noises that I am not expecting! The clicking of a pen if I am not the one clicking! Errrrr!!!

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  11. Wonderful! That's some good stuff right there. :)

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  12. Oh the dreaded squeaker shoes! I HATE those things. Can Not stand them! They are loud, obnoxious and ooh they grate on my nerves. If I "hear" you in public, i'm sorry but I will probably give you the evil eye. :)

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May the Lord bless you and keep you safe today! Thanks for the comment, friends! :)

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